Monday, March 25, 2013

Why I Want to Be a Nurse. {and 5,000 views}

Monday.
noun: a day of the week that it is perfectly acceptable to question your existence, your motivation, and your entire life

AKA: Katelyn's favorite day of the week

For reals. I LOVE Mondays! I decided when I was a sophomore in college and had the most rocking schedule in the world, no class until 4, that Monday's were my favorite day. Everybody else thinks that Monday's are ishy anyways, so why not be the one annoying girl that loves Mondays?

Right? Of course, sign me up.

I've carried this tradition of loving Mondays with me since then. They are fun! A new start to the week, a new chance to meet Dr. Future Husband, etc. etc.

Mondays are also fun because I get out of class at noon versus 6 pm like the other days in the week.

Boo, you, nursing school!!

Which brings me to today's title of why I want to be a nurse.

I feel like, since day one of both le blog and le nursing school days, I have both said and felt this:

I hate nursing school.

Whewwww. There, I  said it. I hate it.

And, it's not because I don't love my instructors, because every single one of my instructers DO love teaching. They are the reason I've stayed with it this long. They have all been nurses for several years and they are super encouraging and responsive and helpful. And it's not their fault I hate nursing school.

It's all mine.

I was salutatorian of my high school, voted Miss KCS, graduated with straight A's in undergrad (except for that C in yoga...another post for another day). See, school was what we will call a breeze for me. I never struggled with projects, papers and calculus. I was GOOD at school. Now, I suck at it.

The problem came to me a few weeks ago and I know what the problem is but I still don't act on the solution I know that I need. I don't know how to study. I never had to study. But, now, I do.

Nursing School is super, super hard. Like, it's not x+y=?

No, more like "If ___________ medication is available from a 25 mg/5 ml bottle and your client is a 24 year old male and he likes Auburn football but what is ordered is 15 ml of ____________, then how much medicine are you going to administer to said patient?

Okay, so you don't need to know that your patient is a male or how old he is or that he favorite team ia Auburn (that's probably his problem, ha!), you only need to know the dosage calculations, etc.

The program I am in ecnourages the NCLEX questions from day 1 where larger universities don't focus on those type questions until much later in nursing school.

For this, I am both grateful and ungrateful! I love the way my instructors present the material and make us think like nurses, but most days, I can't think like a nurse.

I have a test everyday this week and two of my instructors ALWAYS say, "Take it one day, one test at a time." That, surprisingly, has helped me. I can't worry about memorizing 9235986753 drugs by Wednesday, if I don't figure out what chapters I need to read for tomorrow's test. Ekk. Most nights I go to sleep so stressed because I'm terrified of failing the classroom portion of nursing school.

And, that is why I hate it. I'm not really good at it. I'm trying and I do feel like I've made HUGE strides since Day 1, but if I don't pass this semester, then what? I get a little better at studying every test but I'm still not passing two of my classes now. Prayers please!!! I'm not like hugely failing, either, but with a 75 as passing and with me sucking at taking tests, it's hard.

I LOVE the clinical setting. I love  ineracting with and helping people.

Helping people is fun!

Hey, the attractive doctors aren't so bad themselves.

Anyways, back to the point.

I know that I'm a suppose to be a nurse. Obvs. I tried undergrad for four years and already have a bachelor's degree. But, that wasn't what I really believe the Lord wanted for me. I mean, yes, an education and a bachelor's degree is AWESOME but I feel like becoming a nurse would be like winning the lottery for me.

At the hospital, I really FEEL like that is where I am suppose to be. It wouldn't bother me to work a 12 hour shift overnight, actually, I think that would be fun. I love talking to people. I love meeting people and I really love just loving on people. There are so many times I've been in the hospital (for said kidney stones or gallbladder surgery, curse you organs!!) and had both really nice and really unattentive nurses.

I want someone that is my patient in the hospital to sense a peace and understanding when I'm there. I want to be the best nurse I can be and be able to show people the love of God I have, even if I don't ever mention God to them. I know that I cannot just barge into peoples rooms preaching, but I can preach without ever saying a word.

I know I am suppose to be a nurse. I don't exactly know if I'll be able to tell you every vertebrae space and cranial nerve exercises everyday after I graduate (this is where said hot doctor husband will come in handy, he'll keep me educated :] ) but I do know that I'll love and care for every patient like it was my own mother, brother, father, sister, etc. I want people to be able to recover from an illness in a pleasant environment with supporting nurses that can help them improve. I want people to feel safe when I'm their nurse and if something is wrong, that they'll tell me.

I have a personality trait where I want to "fix" or "save" everything (thank you father for this horrible characteristic, haha). My dad ALWAYS fixes everything. He's never once, in my entire life, let me down. I sort of assume that role with my siblings or friends, I don't want them to go through anything hard. I want life to be easy for everybody. I know that isn't possible, but I want my patients to feel like maybe I can help "fix" them.

This is probably a long and useless post to most of you reading BUT I had to write it all down why I want to be a nurse to remind me when the study hours get long and when I continually get a 71 when I need a 75 to pass. The days of nursing school will get easier (in Jesus name!! AMEN) and who knows, maybe one day I'll see you in the hospital (but hopefully not).

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Part 2

This is a random spot to put this but I don't really think it is acceptable to post two posts in one day, so.... a blogger in a group of bloggers that I am in just recently celebrated her 10,000th page view! That is AMAZING! And I know I've had this blog for a month, but I recently hit 5,000 views and about peed my pants. Ok, ok, maybe I DID. But, anyways, if you were one of those 5,000 views, THANK YOU!! :)

Happy Monday!!

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