Wednesday, April 3, 2013

ditches of discontentment.

Good evening lovelies!
I hope y'all had a wonderful Wednesday.
Mine ended good. Started awful.
We have a pharmacology test every Wednesday from now until the final. I'm okay with this. The more tests, the more points. However, when buttheads classmates decide to cheat, the teacher deems the test "compromised" and THROWS THE TESTS OUT!!!
For real. The ONE test this semester I busted it like never before for and then it doesn't even count.
This is why we can't have nice things, classmates.
Anyways, tonight in small group we read about an amazing chapter in "Lady in Waiting" called Lady of Contentment.
If you are single, I suggest you read this book. It's lifechanging!!!
Anyways, the jist of this chapter was, of course, learning to be content in the waiting period of life. Waiting on a boyfriend, waiting on a job, waiting on a friend, etc.
It led to a section I like to call "ditches of dissapointment" and talks about different ways the guys lead girls on.
DISCLAIMER: 1. I understand that not all men are like this but the majority are. So, don't bless me out about how awesome your man is. That's the point of this post-to exclude the godly ones.
2. If you are a guy, don't bless me out either. You probably shouldn't even be reading a girl blog anyway. :)
Okay, here goes:
1. Guys lead girls on by the unwise things they say.
I don't want to be best friends with a guy. I don't think that it's wise for a girl and a guy to be "friends" and hang out all the time and share secrets (even really personal ones) and just "be buddies." Hate me if you want, but I don't think it's a good idea. Guys are wired different. It's genetically proven. Their brain receptors are different. Girls are emotional. And if you call a girl "babe" or "honey" or "sunshine" with no intentions behind it, trust me, girls will automatically put intentions behind it. Having affectionate nicknames for friends that are girls aren't really beneficial to either parties involved.
2. Guys lead girls on by being buttheads.
Okay, so the book doesn't really call men buttheads, but I did. I know several of my besties who have stayed with buttheads for a really long time just because they are in love. Girls, it's not okay to be in love with a butthead. It's not okay for a man to tell you who can and can't hang out with or tell you that you can't do anything with certain people or leave you as an option. YOU ARE MORE THAN AN OPTION. A man who leads you on being being a butthead (aka stringing you along) means that he knows that you are the type of girl he wants to marry BUT he needs to get all the partying and sex crazed nights out of his system first. In this case, there is one solution: R U N.
3. Guys lead girls on by promising a future but not comitting to the present.
This one kind of goes along with everything I've already said BUT if a guy always is texting or calling you (while in or out of a relationship) they are trying to keep you as a side girl. A real man will want to spend all of his time developing a relationship with one girl, not ten. Some guys think that they need to "try out" different girls even after they've found the ONE that they can see themselves marrying. This is such a load of horse poop. For real. If your guy breaks up with you continually to see if things work with another girl, again, R U N. If you broke up once, chances are you'll break up again.
4. Guys lead girls on with sex.
I'll totally not afraid to talk about sex. You know why? Because girls who are afraid to talk about sex with their parents, friends, anyone....normally are the girls who think that sex is the only answer. Sex was designed by God for marriage between one man and one woman. No outside parties. Sex isn't an "extracirricular activity" that's "super fun and pleasurable." Sex is becoming one with someone and it goes a lot deeper than physical satisfaction. The problem with men is when they have sex with someone, they are making a promise to a woman, whether they say anything or not. Sex is the most intimate and personal act in the world. So, if a man is having sex but not in a committed relationship, doesn't that say ALOT about his entire character?
5. Guys lead girls on because they are insecure.
Shocker, right? Guys lead girls on or "play the game" a lot of the time with girls simply because they CAN. Girls are the insecure ones and will believe ANYTHING a man tells them. So, even though a man is insecure, he knows that the woman is probably more insecure and using her insecurity to mask his.
REALIZE when you are being led on. Men were not intended to lead girls on. They were meant to pursue girls. This means that they seek her heart, not her body. They protect her purity, they don't steal it. They treat her like a treasured possession, not a piece of property.
On the opposite side of all of this, girls today need to be humble but CONFIDENT in who they are in Christ. It's what is attractive to the right man. The man of god that God has for you won't be insecure or lead you on or use sex to make you stay.
Don't be in the ditches of discontentment in a relationship because lies guys tell you. Be strong. God has the PERFECT man for you! You may already have him!! If you do, TELL him how thankful you are for him!!


  1. hey girl I just wanted to let you know that your blog button is on my page! Have a great week!

  2. Hmmm... I know a guy who fits this description. He's named 'Every Guy I've Dated In The Past'! haha. But seriously, I think the confidence thing goes a long way. If more gals were like you and made it known this behavior is unacceptable, we'd all be better off!